Sometimes, it really hurts so badly inside when i read everyone's lives of SEP from their blogs. Why am i alone in this? I wish myself away. When will my chance come? I really really want to see the moon from the other side of the world...

My time is slipping away..when will I get my chance? :(

Where the Hell is Matt? (2008)

THis is such an awesome video! It's amazing how the world feels smaller nowadays isn't it? It just takes one man show the beauty in just one video. AHh i wanna travel too!!

BnJ's Psychedelic ParTY~!

Oi mei, see the bnj wristbands?? ahha i buaypaiseh still ask for extra for you.. see i so nice. It rocks hor. So pretty! :D Anw took pics w all the managers n TK and there was only ONE GUY from my batch!! Which was Stuart. THe FIRST ever guy to join BNJs. lol okay just look at the pics. :)

Yes, Yingying came too! :)

TK, Weetiong n Edmund! :)

F1 Qualifying!

AND I WENT DOWN TO THE F1 TRACKSSSS!! I GOT TO GO!! super super super exhilarated. It was such a god-given chance anw..was still ranting yesterday when the test trials were going on, that I'd give anything to be at the race, and today at 630pm, Tiffany called with an extra ticket with Ben that they didn't want to waste!! OMG omg omg. wooots! THanks Tiff! It was super exciting and I'm really glad u chose me to ask along! :)

We sat near the corner at the bend near the floating stage marina, and the view was not the most awesome, but it was thrilling enough! Ours was the bend in the road, where the cars had to slow down abit, so we really got to see the details of e cars and caught a tad more action.. it lasted pretty fast though, after a zooming past a dozen times, which barely took half an hour, five racers were eliminated. Then there was a break in btw for the pitstops, and then more zooming again in e next ten minutes, and it was really intense cos Lewis Hamilton, supposedly e best, was like the last of the top ten previously, and in e second part he got first, then became second as he was trashed by Masa. Okay I don't really know much, but I'll read up soon! haha.

Anyways the excitement was in the air, and i think the night added to the thrill of it all.. Why Singapore so small..if we had more land to dedicate to night racing we could have it all year round! But then. I still think its a waste of resources. lol. Heaps of people came down tho! I think lots of money was made from this. There were Germans, Spanish, Italians, Americans..basically angmohs of all sorts.. and oh yes! Jamie Yeo and Glenn Ong came late and they sat like, 6meters away from us! haha and two teenage guys went up to ask jamie for a shot..so amusing.

Btw, as we were squishing our way thru e crowd to get to our grandstand, we passed a whole horde of Lambos parked near marina..walau damn cool shit. Apparently the F1 racers are chauffered around in those..first time I see so many lambos! haha so swaku.

And the best part is, when e races were done, the throng of ppl started shifting to exits..Damn alot of ppl i tell u. Me, Tiff n Ben decided to wait..and guess who came by! LANCE! haha and we stay in e same place!! So we decided to split, and I am so super lucky Lance got an SLR w him! Tiff n Ben shlda stayed. We tried studying abit on the brightly-lit seats, but after like. 15mins we couldn't take it cos the track was open!! We snuck down and took pictures w his SLR.. wahahaha! How many ppl can say they did that. On freshly raced grounds! lol. took photos w the tire marks and the dangerous bends and the road, everything! hurhur i think I really swaku to the max. But it's just something i think not many ppl would've done before.. only can look from behind the cages of the WORLD'S FIRST NIGHT RACE EVERRR!! haha super happy!!

The cool pictures are still w lance of course, who's damn sweet and said he'd burn them into a cd for me. He really caught damn closeup shots of the cars at e race too! SWEET. esp my fav redbull car. Will post them up when they're here! Felt bad cos he took pro pics of me and was coaching me on photo-taking skills e entire time but my standard still cldn't match his..so sorry lance! Hope pics of u still turned out fine.. :P

Okay 'nuff said, I'll juz post the sad few pics I took! V good can catch e cars w my canon alr...haha. :)

Me n Tiff w our passes! :)Pretty Tiff!

Hurhur I look super happy.The huge billboard we missed. ...and got lost.The barred area of Lambos!! can't see much here.

Commentator follows race onscreen, and e car I caught! :) Okay. pictures don't do the excitement grace.

Me n Lance!

hehe lemme share some of e action here. :)

About Happy times and pretty memories..

OKay..and so i think i've been ranting alot recently, all the emo posts about stepping down and choices and abt certain buggers, so finally here's a chance now to really blog about happier things, like, MAF last night, and Dnd!! Which is special this year, maybe cos it's gonna be my last one ever in KR (U_U), but mostly, cos WE WON BEST DRESSED TABLE!!! woohoos! Would never have imagined I would, ever!!

Most pictures are up on facebook already, but anws i'm still gonna post the prettier ones up here..We went as the BatSquad, and almost all our costumes are handmade and improvised, save Batman, who cheated, and rented his whole suit. :))

Here's mine, which doesn't really look like much cloth, but it turned out pretty! :) It's a zng-ed version of Debbie's tinklebell costume last yr, and i sewed buttons til 6am okayy, no joke!

The Bat Squad!

Here are some of the cute figures found at Raffles TC that night..

There were some nerds..8P

There were some trannies..
A coupla Where's Wallys..

Me with partner Haox, Catwoman n Batgirl, and twin fries!! :) *click to enlarge*

And as if there weren't enough photos taken, we went back to KR and took more!!

Supremely fun! Then the whole BatSquad undressed and went to Westcoast Macs, and did our batjobs swinging around on flying foxes.. :D

Okay on to MAF last night..the new block comm planned a real fun night out at the C-cret MAF place! Oops my own pics aren't up yet, but anyways, it was a very pretty night, with all our sparkler drawings in the air and tiny parachutes which floated down with light stick rings when we were singing our CBlock song.. Such a wonderful idea! Really brings back my year one memories, and I'm sure it left an impression on most of this yr's freshies n yr 2s too!
Turnout was AWESOME! And we looked sooo pretty with our lanterns!

Me n Lester w our fishies!

Fish.

Heart. Star! I zai not?? haha!! :D
TY Star!! i love this pic!

And the night ended excitingly with the C.W.A.T team revealing the lost Putzi which is Blackie's favourite toy..story up soon when pics are up!!! :))

Okay, tonight, i feel like dirt. absolutely like dirt, and very stupid too. Ochi just spent near two hours in my room dissing me about how I could have ever dated a chinaman, and although part of that feeds my ego for the fact that from the way he says it, he's trying to say i deserved so much better; but I feel absolutely like crap however, cos he just emblazoned the flat fact that I've been w a chinaman for like 3yrs, and how could I ever be so idiotic.

Clement gave me the same looks too that day at Esther's party!! ARGHHHH I can just stab myself to death. Whyever did I not see two years ago from this perspective? If only I could have thought this way earlier. So what's good about SHanghai? It's still chinah. Urgh Why does Ochi's perspective matter in the first place. I really feel damn stupid. SOmeone shoulda slapped me awake earlier.

Oh man. and Clement asked stuff that made me think. Just, really think. And sometimes it just seems scary that maybe, even if someone good really wants me, maybe, I might not want him cos I don't know what good I'll give back, and hell. That is a such a stupid thought. What's w e inferiority complex man. Argh. Ochi at 5am totally drives me nuts.

Wake me up when september ends - Sungha Jung

This kid rocks! Super talented for his age. Love this song on his guitar. Enjoy~ :)

Procs suck.

Inertia won again. hmphs. I really really deserve to be shot. And even then i think the bullet will bounce off my fats. Hmphs. :S

Xiaowei I miss you my running buddy cum talk dirty neighbour.... sighs. I'm so bored. I really really am. Just not joining enough or something, and growing fat and lazy.. I'm all talk and no walk man. C'mon! GRoove up the spirit, babe!! Tie up those shoes and hit the road!! Grr I'm so pissed with my procrastination. If this goes on i'm gonna remain single til i'm 50 man. haha!

Anyways. I think right now i'm in a very stagnant position..just waiting for NOC results to hit me.. quickquickquickquickquick!!! I really can't wait for it to be out. At least let me know so I can move on to the next step!! I'm already one muscle beat away from clicking the WAT application submission, and all heart in in preparation for C-ommand with this batch of seniors!!

NOC faster gimme a confirmation so I don't pace around so much in my mind... :( If I really do get it it'll be a world of changes for me to embrace! I'm half prepared to give a year of my life to Upenn, but I'm really scared at the thought of it too.. I'm so super slack now, if i get it, it means I have to go all out and actively seek continuous improvements and be on the ball all e time, instead of gg for my holiday at WAT... sighss.. decisions decisions decisions.

Okay enough of procrastinating!! Work starts tomorrow!!! hm. lol.

Lucky

Songs like this just make me wanna be in love.

C-teped down!

We've officially stepped down! As blockcomm 0708, Cest la vie.. I didn't cry! I didn't shed a single tear, til i really came back to my room actually.

I have no idea why..I just felt this intense wave of emotions; something like loss, and emptiness and relief; a tad of regret, a slosh of reluctance, some uncertainty as how i'd live the rest of this entire term, and a tinge of envy and anticipation for what's going to come under the new block comm.. It's really a strong strong team! And I am really tingling with excitement for what they can bring..It's been a long time I think, when we could laugh together on rooftop sessions--those days when lionel and tat were around..and then then those times we just gossiped in random rooms.. and it's been long since i felt free and responsible-less, and not always having to be on the watch for stragglers to pull them back into the fun all the time so no one is left out. I know this batch will bring it back. I just know it at heart! And it's final year now, even if they don't, i'm excited cos I know it's a fresh new start and things will rev up all over again, just like the current ibg where Cblock always rocks the courts with our cheering..

But but. I know for the next three weeks at least, it'll feel like i just broke up, all over again. This time, with the bunch of people i think I got closer to mostly near the end of our reign..I'll have the withdrawal symptoms..it's already starting! I kinda don't wanna lose the term "block comm".. and it's just an auto-reaction to that term for one year now, and i just have to remind myself i'm not blk comm anymore!! *sobs* I don't have to jio ppl whenever there's smth on now, and i can start losing the tendency to look out for the cblkers's welfare..it's just hard to get used to!!

I guess, even though there were countless imperfections in our performance, I really do hope we did enough; every day with crossed fingers I perform our tasks, and I really wanted it be the best we could be! But no matter what it was just different from C-rew and I was kinda sad about it at first. BUt i know now what we did in that one year can't be erased nor redone, and at least we left a momento for the block in a portrait in the lounge, and I am really proud that the new senior block comms totally trash me and josh like mad..super zai people! I really can't wait i really can't wait.

Tonight marks a new beginning for Cblock, and even though I don't play a major role in it, I'm glad I'll be a part of this year; I can't imagine missing it for the world!