Chingay'10~

It's a really really bad thing, this effect on people, that urge to always want what you can't get.. I'm itching so bad to write and ask for it but i know i must not be defeated in this battle of will and emotion display; it's like a game of manipulation. Perhaps it's another mind game I created, but how else should it be? It is the only ever way I know how to play it. I just wish it werent' so complicated, it never was supposed to be this way. sighs.

Alright enough of the mysterious talk. Wanted to blog about the fantastic Chingay parade yesterday!! It was a riot of colours and a wonderful display of dance and music! So glad to be a spectator this time after last year's participation; I thoroughly enjoyed myself! Though I think i might've looked like a maniac throwing abandon to the wind and running alongside the KR troupe waving the gold pompom. -_-. haha, we only live young once no?

Came alone actually, but the great thing about a community past or present is that some of it sticks around all the time! Was supposed to wait for joce and beng for my tickets, but I met some Eblkers near the stands and entered early, trying to check out the floats and all.. entered the stands with dozens of KR ppl already seated in bunches, but I still ended up seated with just Daniel alone cos I was too excited and didn't know I could sit with the Cblkers! Boo.

But I still enjoyed the whole procession! The number of people performing was immense; I loved the front part where there were dozens of Lion and Dragon dancers, which at some point had those real fire crackers which were deafening and uber smoky. But I always held some fascination for fire crackers I have no idea why, and these were the kind which were banned and we hardly ever see in Spore. They literally go pi li pa la!! hahaaha okay bimbo i know but i was really intrigued. And I loved it when the place burst open with canary yellow paper slips that floated all around and twirled down towards us! It really is an experience you can't get watching it from TV.

Anyway can't rmr much about the rest, I really wish I had a DSLR so I could take pretty pictures of such moments; pretty sure I would capture a picture to depict what I felt. That's already been sitting in the piggybank list. :)

So when KR's float came by we started cheering from our side, and a few of us ran down from the stands to follow their movement towards the end..super crazy!! I really hope i didn't embarrass myself. LOL. But that was really the fun part! i only wish that I had more company! Should've joined rach and joycie them on the first day.. :( But i had joce for company, which was good as well.

Met up with Heidi and zhu and some of the Cg gang and hung out til late..it was a good night, it's back to work tmw..

Gosh I'm super worried for so many things not done!! Gahh I really hope that all's going to be fine for the SRM, people do come down and support ya! :) Clarke Quay, Clarke Quay!


I really can't wait for a holiday.

Rawrr in the year of 2010~

Finally, there are some decent pictures for me to post on my pic-starved blog!! Cos sis came back and i used her cam to go round snapping pics during our first CNY after Ah kong's passing..

:( I was a tad nostalgic and missing him when we got our first ang bao from ahma on chuxi night after the steamboat... It is usually after or followed by Ahkong's first angbao!! The rest of the aunties and uncles give theirs the next day on Chu yi..Can't believe like 3 years has passed since the last official CNY where we used to take family pictures in our small families and then altogether as a huge bunch!

Ohwell, anyway we took a cousin picture for Emmie who's away in NZ! Check us out, all grown up and tall now, no more those kids on the floor dressed in flowery dresses! :) Super fast.

Anyway this year's CNY was rowdy and vibrant, and we had the buffet again on the first night for the Sinma staff, our tradition for years now except the last couple..super crowded! The food ran out pretty quick too! But we were so bored we started camwhoring. haha! see below.

I realise with visiting, that when we are finally old enough to understand the true meaning behind visiting the extended relatives, that they have suddenly become pretty old. Many of them are frail and the age shows with dark spots and cracked voices, slowing movements.

Instead of mindlessly chomping down on the usual goodies, I start to listen to the conversations only my parents have each year with them..suddenly realising that this might not be, in another 5 years down the road.. I wonder how things will be like when we take over as parents, and my parents take over as being the "visited".. I hope things will be the same, if not more close-knit. :)

Anyway, here are some of my fav pics!

雨过天晴！

Yes it truly feels like the clouds have moved away and i just threw a huge haversack off my back! I think even my colleague feels the change and i'm full of bounce today. :D

Things are settling better and seemingly more manageable for the SRM and it the slots are slowly coming through..I hope the lady with 10shops zidong come and find me after haggling for the minimum price without giving any confirmation! Grr. I don't neccessarily need you now, my hardwork has paid off, though i can't be too complacent. yet.

Still. Happy that things are moving along better, and hopefully the cheques will come in as well! :) As always, things can always be worse. haha my tagline recently.

Well of course, happiness stems not only from progress for the SRM, but from the heartstrings tied oh-so-far away too.. every obstacle we face just drives the fact that it matters that much to me, more starkly into my unconvincing brain. It's just impossible to not feel anything even with the distance. Theo, u're wrong, Brain, u were wrong too. Apparently the emotions seem all the more tangible because that's all we have right now.

And the fact that we are both affected the same way makes those feeling somehow more worthwhile? that it isn't one-sided and somewhere miles away, we were both hurt and then felt the pain lift away when the argument was solved.. If I am not wrong, someone reallyreally likes me as much as i want him; too bad we are miles apart.

haha cheesy i know.

kk gg to stop here cos i shluoldn't be blogging at work!Tata.

I hate dealing with crazy uncles.
I duno why i'm feeling so blue today.
I hate waiting.
I hate being used.
I hate not being able to help being used.
I hate feeling so sorry for myself.
I hate being stuck where i am.


I'm so glad i'm seeing J in half an hour.